Okay, so I really freaked out this weekend. I mean I had reason to…Hello. No phone call all weekend. Well, last night he called. Finally. And I guess he was so sick he had to go to the ER. Poor boy. I guess I can’t be that upset. Besides we’re not in a relationship. And not everyone thinks like I do. He called…Finally.

So I’m not as upset. But I will back off a little. I really don’t need to be so stressed out right now anyway. I have so much school and I have to deal with my finances.

I just really don’t want to be treated like crap, or disrespected. I really don’t think that I can handle another guy that disappears…So whether Beanie Boy and I work out or not I have to remember my Self. I’ll go into that another time.

Just wanted to update you, let you know that I freaked out. And things are ok.
XOXO
~Ariel

I don't understand why this keeps happening to me! Really? What is SO WRONG with ME?

I know that I like things a certain way. I know that I can be wild and out of control. But I can also be the most caring and selfless person when it comes to a guy I care about. I may be uptight about some things, but I can also be very easy going at the same time. I like to have fun. I'm usually always doing something. I'm working on my education which will in turn give me a better opportunity in the business world. So WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?!!!

I just don't understand how things can go from phone calls everyday, spending time together and talking about everything under the sun and moon, to nothing...I know that we can get busy, but if you really like someone you will text or call. Or return a call. I feel so broken right now. And this isn't like when my relationships ended. This is like me putting myself out there, to someone I don't know. Not expecting anything out of it, and then actually liking the guy...come to find out that he is too imature to be with me. He's not ready for a girlfriend. He's selfish, and has too many things to do in life.

Who said that you have to do these things while being single? Who made up this rule!? What happened to the days when you could find someone that you really like and want to be around, and then do everything you want to do and do stuff together too! Why is this impossible?

I have NO idea....I am tired... I am tired of tears...I am tired of opening up to people... And I am tired...

I have lost all faith in Love. I really don't think that it's in my plan for this lifetime... I know that I am only 26, but really I've dated about 15-20 people in the past 13 months... And only about 5 of them were people I actually thought could be boyfriend material...

BTW, Beanie boy has fallen off the face of the Earth. I texted once and called once...Nothing...In three days.
~Ariel

Crazy Ass Ex

Snow White here with a doisy......

Well, we said that we would have some great stories for you and boy do I have a good one. So, I’m sitting at my new house with a bunch of friends yesterday watching football and having a grand ole’ time until my phone starts ringing off the hook with a blocked number. I don’t answer it the first couple of times because I don’t answer the phone if I don’t know who it is – this is because I tend to give my number out to the most random people when I’m out and about. So I finally answer the phone because they continue to call, and who is it you ask? It’s The Ex’s new girlfriend…….. I know you are probably thinking weird…… Me too. So, she is calling because she wants to know what exactly is going on between us. I proceed to tell her that we aren’t dating or anything but we still do occasionally SLEEP together – not sex sleep, just sleep. That he tells me all the time that he still loves me and wishes that we could just figure it out and be together.

You can imagine that she isn’t very happy with this information. She was told that we were just best friends but that I was still in love with him and he would cancel plans with her to hangout with me because he felt bad for me and didn’t want to hurt my feelings. WTF??? Hurt my feelings??? He was the one who wanted to spend every single waking moment with me!!!!! And here’s the good part – she also tells me that I should know that he has all my passwords for my bank account and phone records and that he has been spying on me for the last 3-4 months. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!!!!!! This is why she thought something weird was going on because if we weren’t dating why the hell would he care what I was doing, right? So she gets smart, steals my number from his phone and calls me. I know this all sounds very high school, believe me yesterday I thought I went back in time 8 years and could see myself sitting on the bleachers meeting with this girl and swapping stories.

After being on the phone for about an hour and a half with this chick getting every single piece of info from each other, I get off the phone with her and immediately call him. He answers and I say very calmly “Guess who I just got off the phone with? Your girlfriend you fucking piece of shit!!!” I then proceed to hang up. He doesn’t call me back for about an hour because he was on the phone with her trying to explain everything to her. He then calls me and was being very apologetic and saying a lot of bullshit, I can barely contain myself at this point and am so pissed. He explains that he is in love with both of us and that he’s sorry and that things just started to get out of control. And I say “I don’t care who the fuck you’re in love with, YOU STOLE MY PASSWORDS AND INVADED MY PRIVACY!!! You were one step away from becoming stalker guy who follows me around and hides outside of my house peeking through my windows. YOU ARE FUCKING PYSCHO!!!!”

Needless to say, I’m glad I already moved out. At least I don’t have to talk to him anymore. The only problem is that we have a lot of the same friends. And we are a pretty tight group. So I am going to have to see his stupid face when we all get together. At least they all know what really happened because all of his friends were the ones at my house that day. So they heard everything…….. They all think he is a loser, serves him right.

Hopefully this is the end to this nonsense.

P.S. Gym Monkey and I are planning another Ghost Hunting trip, I'll let you know how that goes......

Confused, Ariel...

It's nearing the end of the first month in 2009, and here I am still confused as ever. I thought that by being carefree and fun, I wouldn't care anymore. And I'd be able to just date and...basiclly have fun.

But NO. It's Ariel you're talking about...
So, I went on a few dates with the tall guy. All he wanted was that thing that every guy wants. And now...I've managed to leave my nice coat at his freakin house! Crap, I've got to get that.

And Beanie Boy...Well, we had a relationship talk the other day...He wants to take things slow, but he really likes me...Well, at the time of the conversation I was thinking (Well, I'm dating two guys right now..So, I should take things slow...No need to commit...) and then (it hit me...I really do like this guy, and now I'm probably going to be hurt...) So, I should probably be honest with him about wanting to be in a relationship. This isn't ok with me, not being in one...But I want to take it slow too, because I don't want to be in another bad relationship.
Confused...I am so Confused...